Photo by Juan Rumimpunu on Unsplash
“I have no regrets in my life.”
I always view that statement with doubt. Is it possible to live life without regrets? No random flashbacks of missed opportunities or moments of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time?
My scepticism speaks to my own belief about regrets.
I have a 200-page book of regrets - tucked safely in my mind, randomly jumping up at me whenever they wish. Regrets spanning my faith, friendships, career, writing, even clothing.
What has improved is my resilience to ignore the imagery of regret as a sealed casket that speaks, announcing: “it’s done, you’re done, let’s go.”
Fear and anxiety, those two tumbling waves still exist in my life, but we don’t get along as much. Our interests have diverged.
I can either carry the burden of my 200-page book of regrets or view it as motivation by:
Listening to myself first. It’s great to ask for advice from experienced people, however our instincts are all we need sometimes.
Acknowledging that obsessing over outcomes is the biggest ‘enemy of progress.’ Spit on it! Reject it! Since stumbling across the advice of ‘focus on the process, instead of the result,’ I am less bothered about success and failure. Let me just start, right? Then build consistency. Everything will fall into place, even though pivots are inevitable.
We’re all smiling (or screaming) at each other while hiding problems. Take it easy with people – not every time, but take it easy.
Regret is a superpower that should be used, not to daydream about missteps but to build a clearer view of who we want to be.
Note: Who we want to be – not who we think we should be.